War is on
by Jake Jackal
Summary: (romance too.) When the teddiz have a new secret weapon, a new war is on, and the squirrels are hauled back to the Teddiz land, but can they stop what the teddiz think is unstopable?
1. Default Chapter

Okay, so my first game fiction, its about Conker, and takes place after the great milk war. Here is the summery.

When the teddiz have a new secret weapon, a new war is on, and the squirrels are hauled back to the Teddiz land, but can they stop what the teddiz think is unstopable?

Remember that squirrel love is gonna be on this one. Anyways here is the first chapter, also I did this for Live and reloaded...

Chapter 1- The Teddiz are back.

A squirrel ran to a big hexagon shape (the hexagon is the squirrels pentigon okay?) "Sargent, we have news on the Teddiz!" he said, this was Milenko. Well Milenko showed a strong squirrel some reports "I stole them this morning sir." Milenko said, "Good job Private!" the strong squirrel said as he opened the document

_**Dear Teddiz Leader.**_

_**Today I have some extroidiary news! I made a new bomb that can destroy ze whole squirrel population! It is sort of like ze atomic bomb in ze great milk war. So we shall see its full purpose tomarrow when we launch it at ze desert near ze mag lake, shit! We are going to kick some squirrel ass in ze next war!**_

_**Signed, Ze Professor...**_

the sargent looked at Milenko "Milenko, do you have the timing of this event?" "Well no sir" "Okay then, thanks for this information." "Yes sargent!" Milenko said as he walked off.

3 months later at Mag Lake-

Ze professor was loading up the bomb code named "Destruction", it was set to be dropped by a plane right next to Lake Mag, ze professor and the others were nine-hundred miles away and they put a captive squirrel next to the bomb, also another captive squirrel 500 miles away. "Okay, we will set off ze bomb in three minutes!" Ze Professor said and began to count down, and after three minutes the plane dropped the bomb, moving as fast as it could to get away from the lake. After the bomb ladned it took thrity minutes for the clouds to dissapear and what they saw amazed them, the whole lake evaporated, the one squirrel close to the lake had about eighty-nine percent of his skin ripped off, and the other's body just ripped apart. Ze Professor laughed evily "We shall see ze squirrels die in the next war!" he said as the king teddi came out, he smirked.

back at squirrel's land-

"Today soldiers, we have a war on our hands! No one knows how long it will take, but this is some serious shit! A spy we sent to Mag Lake the day of the bomb said that this war is starting! Most of you will not make it back, I want you all to fight for this country, our country. We will be leaving for Slanti (Land of the teddiz, I made it up.)!" The sargent said to his troops, everyone saluted and left, leaving the sargent alone.

Later that day-

A plane was heard flying up, everyone looked to see some of the once children men and women leaving this land and going to the land of teddiz. After they were leaving, the sargent looked around "We will reach Slanti in eight hours! Get some sleep and prepared!" he said as he went into the control room. Milenko looked around and saw the two people that were sitting next to him, Jecki, a squirrel who survived and has scars of the war before, and Maj, one of the thirteen girl squirrels to come in the 76th Platoon, she and Milenko both became friends during the training they took.

seven hours later-

a crash was heard as everyone got up, Maj looked through the window and saw the right wing shot down. "HOLY SHIT!" she said as the plane began to fall down, it was the middle of night and the plane was crashing. Sarge looked at everyone and said "We might not make it troops. We are a few miles from our destination and the plane is falling at a 72 degree angle and the we are having some teddiz shoot at us!" he said as the plane continued to fall, after it crashed a few squirrels died. Milenko looked around and saw gun shots flying everywhere. He watched as a teddi shot right at him, he ducked barley missing the bullet and sawthe squirrels running, he began to fallow them until he saw more teddiz come out of holes everywhere "Danm it!" he said as he shot at them, one that he hit, he was amazed as blood, not stuffing came out of his head. "Just run..." he whisperd to himself as he began to run again.

After everyone reached a for the hole, the sarge looked at everyone "These bastards are giving it all they got, we better be smart or we are dead." he said as everyone looked up, bullets flying everywhere. "Okay people, this is our home for now, the dirt is what we use, so dig in. (Got that from the Conker offical home.) You people pick off the Teddiz while I prepare." Sarge said as he begen to dig in the fox hole. Everyone sighed as Jecki said "This is gonna be a hell." as he looked up. Milenko reloaded his gun and slowley crawled out of the fox hole after the bullets died down. Milenko got up as every squirrel besides Sarge jumped out and began to fire like crazy, that was until the lord of teddiz took out the big teddiz. All of a sudden half of a squirrels head was blown off "What the?" Milenko said as he looked at the now dead squirrel. He looked to where the bullet was shot and saw a sniper and three big teddiz jump off the place they were standing at. Once they landed the squirrels saw that these teddiz were gonna give them even more hell, the first one had a rocket launcher aiming at a squirrel plane and launching three rockets at it. The others had the same rocket launchers and more. The one behind the first said "Come on Grund and Lid, lets get him!" so they knew most of them. The one named "Lid" shot a rocket at Milenko "SHIT!" he said as he ran away from the rocket coming ever so closer, until he could feel the heat come towards of him until he ducked down missing the rocket as it slammed into a wall blowing it apart. When Jecki turned around he saw a fire burning from the wall that was just destroyed and a plane falling "This is fucking worse then hell..." he whisperd to himself as the plane landed and five dozen (thats dozen as twelve) squirrels came out, most were scouts like Milenko and Jecki, while a few were Big gunners like the three Teddiz, and fewer then the big gunners were long rangers and sneakers (Like ninjas) and were killing off the teddiz.Milenko ran into the plane and looked inside "Better then ours..." he said, few things were damaged and nothing was on fire. As he looked outside he could see thousands of bullets fly everywhere, he looked and saw Maj and Jecki firing "Come in here you guys!" he said as they walked in followed by the squirrels that helped them and Sarge. "Who are you guys?" Sarge said to these squirrels, "We are the 37th platoon. We are here with the 76th platoon to make it easier." one said as he walked behind them all, it was Rodent "Rodent?" Sarge said as he looked at the squirrel, yea, this was Rodent, but he changed. He now had a different voice and wasn't wearing the armor he was said to have bought "Ahhhh, Milenko I heard about you! Your the one squirrel who did the training in record time." he said as Milenko replied "Yes sir!" "Well you sure are good, Sarge must of been drunk when you were being prepared" Rodent whisperd silently to Milenko "I havn't seen shit like that scince Conker..." Rodent said loading up his gun as another batch of bullets shot into the airplanes wall. "We won't have much time you guys... We need to take out those machine gun and sniper nests up on that hill... Milenko, Jecki, Maj, and Jeckel your coming with me." Rodent said and continued "Sarge, Cloak, and Diman fight the fire for us while we go up the hill. After that I say you leave the plane and get ready to leave here and run to the next hole," Then Rodent kissed Cloak "Please Cloak, be carefull.." he said to her before he ran out the door and the other squirrels were shooting at the nests..

End Chapter...

Well the first chapter is up and I lnow some might like it, read and review


	2. Past, present, and future

Chapter 2 is here so here it is, also a bit of spoilers, when the thing says "-Flash-Back-" just skip it if you don't want to know what happens

Chapter 2- the past, present, and future.

Milenko ran up ahead with Rodent as Maj and Jecki were firing behind them still running, pretty soon they were at another fox hole "So, Rodent, who are you and who is 'cloak'?" Jecki said as Rodent looked up and saw a rocket speed towards the Teddiz base, Rodent then told them

Flash back-

ten years ago in the last assault, Rodent was the one who was told to wear this armo that could deflect any hit, Conker, the bravest squirrel saved him and got him from the teddiz base, Rodent thanked Conker and helped him stop the war. Rodent actually found himself in the army once again but this time a sargent, he got rid of his armor and decided to try and live a better soldier life. After 8 and a half years Rodent met another soldier named Cloak, she was butiful in everyones eyes and had the brain to match, Rodent felt confident and talked to her, and soon they found them both in love.

end flashback-

Jecki looked at Rodent "So you fought with Conker in the last assault, well lets see I think we might be down here for a while, they ain't stopping, so Milenko, whats your story?" Milenko put his paws behind his head and his gun inbetween his legs

flashback-

Milenko was getting ready to leave town when he saw the worst thing, a big bomb brigade landed in the city a few miles later to his. Horror filled his eyes as he watched, teddiz began to fall from the planes after the big bomb and landed sending troops to everyones door and killing everything that moved. After 6 hours the brigade stopped and the teddiz moved into the planes and left. Milenko went into the city and found about the 8th (out of ten) of the whole city destroyed and people slaughterd, the ones who did live didn't have alot of time, most of them had an arm of leg dispatached from their decomposing bodies. Milenko thought what could of happened if it was his home town, and decided to forget that idea and make sure it didn't happen again. So Milenko joined the army.

end flashback-

Milenko smirked to himself as more blood splashes landed on his helmet and a teddiz head rolled inside "Jecki, your not telling us yours, why don't you pull it out of the closet?" Milenko said as he looked up, Jecki grabbed his gun,

flash back-

Jecki looked up from where he was, Teddiz were shooting every where as they left the country of Slanti, but Jecki was the only one who saw it, it was Ze Professor flying out, ten years later every one found out another war was on.

end flashback-

Milenko looked towards Maj "Your turn..." he said as Maj looked to the right

flashback-

Maj's father looked at her, she was an only child and trained alot due to her and her father doing obstical courses. Her father was a soldier and she wanted to be like him. He was someone who saved everyone from something that could of destroyed anyone, so she joined the army after her fathers death to make him proud of her

end flashback-

"Hey everyone! The fire is dyeing down!" Jecki said as the bullet brigade started closing, as soon as it was done they all ran out of the hole to the door. After they reaches it Rodent began to pick the lock as the fire began to go up again. when they unlocked the door they were met by dozens of teddiz running through the door "Shit..." Rodent said firing at them while dodging bullets whizzing by him. As did everyone else, the shooting continued for more then twenty minutes, until all the teddiz were dead. "Bitches..." Rodent said as he looked at the teddiz corpses on the floor. before they all could endure the moment they saw the fire begen to shoot again, the line of fire was a few minutes away from them and if they moved in front of they would all die, so they calmly just relaxed, Rodent began to smoke a ciggar "So, what do you think would happoen if we lost this war?." everyone replied with a silent "Armegeddon.." soon after the shooting stopped so they were able to run again, soon they saw several more squirrels firing at teddiz shooting at the squirrels. Milenko and the others ran behind a box with the other squirrels, one's eyes began to burn as he jumped from behind where he was, grabbing one of them and slamming his head into a wall, crushing it instantly. Then he grabbed one and threw it up slamming onto a spike. The teddi looked at him and in its own voice said "Die... Bastard.." as it raised up its grenade launcher, Milenko saw this as he grabbed an axe from the wall and threw it at the teddi ripping it head off its body, the head slowley rolled of the bloody metal of the axe and landed on the floor, blood oozing out of it. Milenko looked at it as the one with eyes blazin g smiled, an innocent smile. Rodent looked at him puzzled "Okay, Mr. happy, what the hell did you do?" he said as the big squirrel looked at the body. "He went berserk..." a sniper from behind him appered, his left eye was missing and had a metel red eye over it "And who the fuck are you? A fuckin' pirate?" Rodent said to the squirrel "Phazyr, A-classed long ranger, so I would shut up if I were you..." Phazyr (It sounds like Phazer) said as he shoved his sniper rifles barrel into Rodent's face "54th platoon. Meet vato" Phayzer said pointing to the big squirrel, then showed them the other squirrel's names, Fago was a good sneeker, he had a sword and a sabre, Likon was an grunt, plain and simple. Then Rodent introduced everyone. "What platoons are you guys from?" Rodent was the first to reply "I'm from 76th platoon, and these people are the 37th platoon." Phazyr looked at them. "Well, down to buisness." Phazyr said while pulling out a map he stole from the teddiz "In Beach Dead (Got the name from Conker: Live & Reloaded, also remember that Slanti is made up of many different lands, Beach Dead is just a big island in Slanti. Slanti is a country remember.) the teddiz have found the dead Panther King here." Milenko looked at Phazyr "What does the panther king have to do with all this?" "If you can remember right, when Conker killed the panther king, he flew out into the sky where he fell onto Beach Dead, now the reason is, Ze professor had planted lots of those 'alien' things in his coarpse, they won't die in that condition because they were made to live in that element. We have to find out how to destroy them all."Rodent looked down as he pulled out a gun "Then we better hurry.." so they ran out.

After a few minutes of running they stopped looking around wondering where they were, they soon realized they were back outside "Oh great, we went in a fuckin' circle!" Rodent yelled at Phazyr, who didn't hear him "Shut up dumb ass... Look, we are at the beach, I think that one of theboats is still intact, we should get off this mutha fuckin' island before we are really dead..." Phazyr said as another thirty teddiz came from another house. "What about the Panther King dumb ass?" "Are you blind? My eye saw the coffin, and nothing is in it! They probally moved it to a new place, likley a labratory." "ANd how the hell do you know that shit?" Rodent and Phazyr argued, then Phazyr pointed to some teddiz going to a helicoptor "Quick, get the panther king to the labratory!" one of them said. Rodent pulled out a communicator "Cloak, get everyone to the north-west beach, we are leaving to a labratory..."

end chapter

okay, thats all for now.


	3. Pulse of the maggots

Alright ya'll, heres chapter 3 of "War is on." Also their is a parody in this one, actually two, Splinter Cell and Tenchu, and also a song thats called "pulse of the maggots" by slipknot. **_The song lyrics are gonna look like this! _** okay?

Disclaimer- don't own Conker's Bad Fur day.

Chapter 3- Pulse of the maggots

RODENTS P.O.V-

I jumped into a boat as everyone did the same, one of the teddiz saw us, but luckily Phazyr sniped it, danm he good at his job. Before I knew what was happening another plane was right behind us, oh yea, we were fucked beyond belief. But then I noticed something, the plane was coming in close to us. I had an idea "Everyone, when I jump, jump and grab the plane. Use your knifes to dig into the plane!" I said as everyone nodded. yea, this was what the army was about! We all ducked while the plane was firing machine guns at us, I looked out and saw more boats with squirrels in them, alot of them were still full of squirrels, few died in those. but some of the boats were falling into the water, the squirrels were dead or drowing. The plane than came over us, I jumped and slammed my dagger into the wall while everyone did the same.

GENERAL P.O.V-

Rodent looked at them, he was yelling due to the fact that the engine of the plane was loud as fuck "NOW CLIMB TO THE DOOR. THEN MILENKO RIP OPEN THE DOOR AND EVERYONE WILL JUMP IN KILLING THE TEDDIZ!" Milenko agreed as he slammed his paw into the planes metel skeleton, then pulled out his knife and slammed it in quick, everyone followed until Milenko was next the door "SOMEONE GIVE ME A SWORD!" he yelled

MILENKO'S P.O.V-

I looked at Cloak as she handed me her sword, I nodded to her as I silently cut off the planes door, so they wouldn't know the sword was their, I then gave her the sword and pulled out my shot-gun. I kicked open the door and jumped in, then every one did the same, after a while we kicked all of the teddiz ass's in this plane. I kicked off a teddiz dead body from one of the chairs and jumped into it. Rodent did the same and we went to pick up the other squirrels. After we picked them up, we saw where the teddiz were going, I smacked myself once and looked again, yea it was real. It was a fuckin' labrotory the size of a fuckin' skyscraper! We all looked back to where we were going, and saw a plane heading after us, I dodged it's move the slam right into us, as Phazyr was in the first machine gun to the right and Maj was on the left Rocket Launcher, they shot at it until I heard them say "WE GOT IT!" I smiled and landed onto the land of the

labratory.

-GENERAL P.O.V-

Jecki stuffed his hands into his red and black pants, that made Milenko think why his platoon had those type of clothes, while Rodent had green and brown, and Phazyr had blue and black. All of the squirrels jumped out being prepared for anything, and they were right, out of the doors came along thirty teddiz "THIS IS BULLSHIT YOU GUYS!" Milenko said as he grabbed his gun and upper cutted a teddi with it, then began to shoot to the teddi that landed on the floor. Cloak slammed her sword into the stomach of a teddi, then grabbed his uzi and put it to the teddiz head, and began shooting at the helmet, ripping it apart and brains flying everywhere. Phazyr jumpped ontop of the helicoptor and began to fire with a little pistol he had as a secondary weapon. Maj jumped on top of one of the teddiz heads and took of his helmet, then another teddi began shooting at her, she jumped off the teddiz head and the bullets landed on the teddi she was standing on. The teddiz, however, didn't only get casualities, most of the casualities were from squirrels, one squirrel was sliced by a V by a teddi who yelled "KILL THEM ALL!" another had his head blown off by a shot gun, and most were just killed, when the smoke cleared, Milenko was holding onto his left arm, blood coming from it, and vato was laying on the floor, blood creeping from every part of his lifless body, everyone looked at the bodies of the squirrels, and began to say "I hope you people are in a better place..." Milenko looked at everyone as Maj grabbed his hand and wrapped a cloth around "it won't work really good, but hey, you need something." Milenko looked at the door and all of a sudden had an idea, he jumped into the plane and got out seven black suites "they were just lyeing around!" he said as he put it on, after everyone was done Phazyr looked at himself "sam fisher got nothing on us!" then they all began to walk in.

Milenko crawled on top of one of the pipes on the roof, then saw a teddi walking by, he snapped a silenter on a pistol he had and grabbed the teddi, then rapidly shot at the teddiz head. finally Milenko dropped the body and continued, followed by everyone in the shadows. Everyone climbed ontop of the bar when they reached a big room "Everyone, some how, we found the panther king's corpse before the danmed squirrels!" one of the teddiz said, he was infront of them all "Well, take one last glance" Phazyr said as he pulled out a sniper rifle and aimed it at the front teddiz head "Eat lead mutha fucka" and a silent gun shot was heard by the squirrels as the front teddiz head fell onto the floor and the body dropped. Everyone looked at the squirrels as they jumped down "BE AFRAID BITCHES!" Milenko yelled as he jumped down and slammed his gun barrel into a teddiz head, then pulled it out and shot at one behind him.

_**I fight for the unconventional  
My right, and its unconditional  
I can only, be as real as i can  
The disadvantage is  
I never knew the plan  
This isn't the way just to be a martyr  
I cant, walk alone any longer  
I fight, for the ones that cant fight  
And if I lose, at least I tried  
**_

Milenko looked at the squirrels as Rodent grabbed hold of a teddiz arm and shattered it, then used the bone to cut open its skull.Phazyr launched a grenade at the teddiz, blowing up all of them. Then a big teddi pulled out a rocket launcher and fired it at all the squirrels, Milenko and all of the male squirrels slammed into the wall.

_**  
We, we are the new diabolic  
We, we are the bitter bucolic  
If I have to give my life you can have it  
We, we are the pulse of the maggots**_

Milenko rubbed his head as Rodent got up and went back into the battle, he looked up and saw Maj fighting off a teddi with a sword like hers, it then retracted as the teddi was about to slam his sword into her neck, Milenko jumped and slammed his elbow into the teddi breaking its jaw, then began shooting at it.**__**

I won't, be the inconsequential  
I won't, be the wasted potential  
I can make it, as severe as I can  
Until you realize  
You'll never take a stand  
It isn't, just a one-side aversion  
We've dealt, with a manic diversion  
And I won't, let the truth be perverted  
And I won't leave another victim deserted

Rodent grabbed a teddi as he shot into its stomach, blood flying everywhere. He then pulled out a sword and hit his back with Milenko's back, except he had a jaggad sword that he ripped from a teddiz lifeless coarpse, both grinned as more teddiz came with shot guns, uzis, and such, right as they shot, Milenko and Rodent jumped dodging the bullets as the sliced through the teddiz**__**

We, we are the new diabolic  
We, we are the bitter bucolic  
If I have to give my life you can have it  
We, we are the pulse of the maggots

Do you understand? (yes)  
Do you understand? (yes)  
Do you understand? (yes)  
Do you understand? (yes)

Teddiz ran through these big doors as they shot at the squirrels, some getting a limb chopped off, Phazyr jumped ontop of a light as he grabbed a teddi with him, he then slammd it into the light bulb, slowly burning it, as the lights were turned off, screams from the teddiz and squirrels were heard, when the light flickerd on and off, two sneakers, both teddi and squirrel were facing off, one was Fago, and behind them were entrails and bodies of lifless squirrels and teddiz, the light flickerd on and off, both moving from one place to another in a second.**__**

Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)

Fago jumped down from where he was with the other squirrel, he jumped on the roof as the teddi sneaker began shooting at the roof, until the gun ran out of bullets a wire came onto the teddiz neck as he yelled blood coming from his neck, he chopped the wire and fell on the floor, then threw a spear at Fago, landing it right onto his leg.**__**

We fight til no one can fight us  
We live, and no one can stop us  
We pull when we're pushed too far  
And the advantages is  
The bottom line is  
We never, had to fight in the first place  
We only, had to spit back at their face  
We won't, walk alone any longer  
What doesnt kill us, only makes us stronger

Faygo fell to the floor holding his leg, as Phazyr was shooting around the place, murdering any teddi he could see, one dodged his attack and grabbed his arm and twisted it behind his back, he yelped at this surprise, but then put a pistol to the teddiz eye, he shot at it as he heard a shattering of glass, he turned around and was met by an eyeless teddi, he must of broke off a glass eye. It was breathing easily as it stabbed him.**__**

We, we are the new diabolic  
We, we are the bitter bucolic  
If I have to give my life you can have it  
We, we are the pulse of the maggots

Do you understand (yes)  
Do you understand (yes)  
Do you understand (yes)  
Do you understand (yes)  


Rodent jumped onto a pipe and grabbed a teddi and began choking it until he could feel no breath on his fur, he then dropped it as he jumped down into a puddle of blood, blood covering every squirrel and teddi in eye point, he could hear grenade exploshions and even curses in all the madness, he turned around as he was grabbed by two strong heands that pulled him into the air, the teddi threw him into the wall, Rodent grabbed a rocket launcher from a dead squirrels body and blew out a rocket at the teddi, missing it but still smacking a wall close to him slicing him, he turned around, blood coming from his black and blue right body, he was still fuckin' alive!

_**  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)  
Say it again say it again (we won't die)**_

Milenko pulled out his gun at another teddi coming towards him, he shot blowing off its head and jumped ontop of a pipe watching the carnage, he was tapped on the arm as he turned, met by a teddi who put a gun to his face, the gun was shot as Milenko fell from where he was, landing on a pile of dead bodies he looked at the teddi as he got up, still bleeding from the shot in his eye, he shot at the teddi into its eye blowing it out "Now we are even" Milenko said before he fell to the floor.

After that all the teddiz bodies dropped, everyone looked at Milenko and then at themselves, blood drenched fur was on everyone. Everyone ran to Milenko's side as the grabbed him and took him out, forgetting all about the panther king, who was now leaving into a new land.

end chapter-

MUHAHAHA! A cliff hanger! i'm so evol! Okay, well if any of you are wondering why I put two mass weapons (panther king and atomic bomb) both are actually one, for you see the aliens need an high tempurture (about the tempurture of an atomic bomb) to produce, then they need an excensive cooling of the eggs they are in to be able to hatch, yea I made it up, but it is better then milk making them produce. And yea, Milenko might die, I shall not reveal if he will or not, but the odds are against him so he will most likely die.


End file.
